DEEP INNER HAPPINESS
We're so engaged in doing things to achieve purposes of outer value that we forget the inner value, the rapture that is associated with being alive, is what it is all about.
Today I thought I would reflect on where I am and what is happening in my life.
Last year there were many things I found difficult in my life, and it has been easy to put them down to not having a steady income, which is challenging for me as my strongest money value at present is security. However I know that that is not the centre of my un-ease.
Last week I came to the decision that it is time for me to really reconnect deeply with my values again. I did a weekend of Zero Balancing training and I think all the healing opened my soul up to letting go, going deeper, being true to myself.
I was hearing myself saying to my close friends that I don't have a sense of deep inner happiness, even though I have many things in my life that "make me happy". I am blessed with a beautiful hand-made house, a wonderful relationship with a sweet man, 3 beautiful and totally amazing children, very caring friends, a sweet and dedicated father, and the list just goes on. And yet I became aware that I wasn't experiencing that deep connection with myself. I wasn't feeling like laughing and I felt heavy.
It's easy to just keep "living" and doing things, and the start of the year has been filled with organising this and that. Finally a couple of weeks ago, I decided it was time to do something for myself. So I sat just sat for a while, and what bubbled up into my consciousness over a couple of days was a "retreat" for myself – a challenge to be there for myself.
Taking a dose of my own medicine then, I saw that I need to go back to basics. I would like to get to deeper levels within, to allow that inner happiness that comes with a connection to all that is, to surface. I know it is only me who can be responsible for it. Having more cash might make my life easier, but it won't answer my desire to feel alive. Only I can do that. So I am doing a 90 day retreat (or challenge).
I am allowing ways to come to me, and the first desire I was aware of was to write and be creative. So having made an artwork of my deepest "Being" values, and reconnecting with them again, I committed to doing "Morning Pages" again. Writing every morning and reconnecting with my values and intentions for the day. In the evening I am reflecting on each of my values and filling a page with everything I am grateful for.
I am also walking a minimum of 20 minutes each day, smiling or laughing consciously, and using anchors to remind me to reconnect regularly with my deepest values. As I am doing this I am remembering to do so many other things that reconnect me with myself again-
- Looking lovingly in the mirror at myself
- reminding myself that I just need to be willing to be the energy of what I would like my life to be
- enjoying nature
- valuing relationships
It is so easy to be drifting along in a way that is OK but not really truly alive. The children require attention, the property needs work, we need firewood, ... Already the time I have taken to retreat, even while I am in the middle of family life, has been amazing
Trust yourself – follow your truest path, and be who you are meant to be. If you need support being that, get it now – today – don't wait. Another week/month/year will go by, and we are meant to be living our deepest truest purpose now, not sometime in the future when we have done all the ... (fill in the gap)
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